Notes on Knitting

Oh knitting, you fickle mistress...I designated Sunday a day of rest after I spent Saturday moving Walking With Orphan's main office in all its entirety. I stayed in my pajamas and live streamed the 11:00 service from my church and knit.

Live streaming the service. Hermit life at its finest!

Penelope basked in the sun and enjoyed the bonding time.

Bask, bask, bask.

I finished the last little bit of one hat...

Hat #1. I love the cheerful and vibrant colors!

And got a good ways into a second hat.

Hat #2

These hats are a recently discovered, new favorite pattern of mine called Be Faithful. These are the 2nd and 3rd hats I've made with this pattern. And that's saying something because I rarely knit patterns more than once. The parallel between the title of the pattern and the fact that I have knit 3 hats using it is not lost on me.

At some point on Sunday I decided to wash some hand-knit items that were laying around. This included several hats, a large blanket/throw, and a sweater. Typically, I hand wash each piece (or 1-2 same colored pieces) in the sink with some no-rinse wool wash (like Eucalan). I did that with 3 of the hats. Then I decided that I would put the (very) large blanket, the sweater, and Hat #1 (pictured above) in the washer on a wool/hand wash cycle with cold water and Eucalan thrown in. After they finished washing I put them in the dryer on air dry, no heat for about an hour and a half. And guess what. My beautiful hat and part of the blanket felted.

My beautiful hat...

All felted up.

The sweater also felted slightly but not to the point where it's unwearable (which would have made me uber pissed). The blanket was ok. There were a few sections that felted more than others (due to the fiber content of the yarn) but overall it's still ok. But the hat. It took the brunt of the felting.

Now, logic tells me this shouldn't have happened. Cold water, little agitation, air dry. The only thing I can figure is that the hat got caught under the large blanket and there was more agitation than I thought. I know that the cardinal rule of wool is to NOT PUT IT IN THE WASHER AND DRYER (unless it's superwash) so I guess I got what I was asking for. Thankfully the hat is still wearable (just by someone much smaller) and I have more yarn to make a second one THAT WILL NOT GO IN THE WASHER OR DRYER.

All I have to say is: lesson learned.

Moving Day

A little back story... Last year my parents informed me that my bedroom could no longer be Grand Central Station for Walking With Orphans. This was fine with me as I like to do things in my bedroom like walking, getting dressed, and sleeping and with the donations that were continuing to come in I was rapidly losing the ability to do such things. For 6 months I co-rented some space with our VP, Jonathan, in an office building in downtown Buford. It was a very quirky, hipster place with exposed beams and industrial blackout curtains.

It was a very nice space but I never used it very often. 1. Because it was a 45 minute drive from my house and 2. I really only needed the storage space. But it worked. Then Jonathan moved to New York. We decided to stay in the office space and took over rental responsibilities. That brings us up to present time.

The weekend before Christmas I got a call from Jonathan's assistant, Lindsie (we were still paying rent through her because technically the office was still in the Jonathan's name). The landlord for the office building had called Lindsie to tell her that he had rented out the entire floor and that we had to move. By the end of the year. That gave us a little less than a week and half to find, rent, and move to a new place. Oh and both Jonathan and I were not going to be in town after the 26th (I was headed to Romania and Jonathan was back to New York). Lindsie grappled with the landlord and eventually got him to concede to letting us move out by the 12th of January which would give us 3 weeks to find a new place. How kind of him.

After New Year's I tried (halfheartedly, I'll admit) to find a new space. I'd already been through this several times in the past year (once initially and then when Jonathan decided to move and we thought we might not be able to stay in the office) and I was already tired of just the thought of moving. In the end I rented a climate controlled U-Haul storage closet. Yesterday (Saturday) was moving day. Marissa (secretary, treasurer, operations manager, and general bad ass) came out and we loaded up my CR-V and her little sports car.

Yeah. Moving Day. (Please note the sarcasim.)

This is a totally safe way to travel. Right?

It only took one trip and we managed to get everything from the office to the storage unit. I should have taken a picture of the storage unit but it looks pretty much like a metal closet filled to the brim with boxes and bags. I'd love to say that I will get in there and organize it some day soon but frankly I'm over it for the moment. I've already made the executive decision that we're not moving for 6 months unless someone volunteers to move everything for us for free. At least it's done with and I'm taking today (Sunday) off as a reward (and to keep myself from going insane).

Back in the Swing of Things

I pretty much had to hit the ground running at work on Wednesday despite spending 20 hours traveling the day before. Thankfully the medical assistant who does my scheduling had only put down one new intake for me this week. I have a few kids on my caseload to go see but other than that it's just catching up on things that didn't get finished before I left. Still, there was no day off for me. I've exhausted my leave time and my personal days for the year so I'm waiting it out until February when I get some more time off. We do get MLK day off in a few weeks so that will be a nice opportunity to catch my breath again.

As usual there is always something going on with Walking With Orphans. We have to move our office to a storage unit this weekend since our landlord informed us a month ago he was kicking us out. I also need to finish logging the last donations of the year, file our taxes, and come up with some new system of tracking donations. And I need to figure out most of that before the end of this month so I don't get any further behind. Oh yes, and launch a (big) new campaign and update the website, Facebook page, and Twitter.

Personally I need to take some time to set some New Year's resolutions. Do you think "having more energy" is a reasonable one? I also need to set a new budget, restart my daily quiet time, and get back to my Romanian language lessons. I feel a huge desire to clean things and organize and yet there isn't the time right-this-second to take care of any of it. Oh...and I need to start studying for my licensure test which I will be taking some time this spring.

I really need a team of personal assistants. Any volunteers?

2.5 Hours

On Monday school started in Romania. And my boys came back to the orphanage.

Iulian, me, Florin, and George. My little boys have grown into men!

For about 2 and half hours I watched them play soccer, let them take pictures with my camera, helped them open their presents, and played cards together

This mama's heart is happy again.

Routine

We've definitely settled into a routine here at the team house. In the morning we go to one of the orphanages or have an activity (shopping at the glass factory, visiting the open air market, or cleaning around the house) and then in the afternoons there is usually another trip out to an orphanage and the baby hospital.

I love that moment when things seem to calm down a little bit. Everyone has their shower and sleep schedule worked out. We know who likes to visit which orphanage and make room for them to go there daily. We've found a special kid to bond to. We stay up late to talk and play games and get up early to journal. Everyone has found a little niche to fill for the time being.

In a few days we'll be heading home but, for now, I'm enjoying the stability of routine. Tomorrow a large portion of our group will head out so the feel of the house will change a little yet again but I'm looking forward to a few days of having a smaller group and being a little more free with our time.

Not too much else to report at the moment. There has been lots of kid time. I played soccer and Twister and have colored pictures. I've swung kids around like a swing set, danced like an idiot, and just sat and been close to someone for awhile.

I'll leave you with some scenes from a typical day.

The simple joy of play-doh and hanging out in a box.

Some people make their own fashion statements.

Making crafts to help understand God's love for us.

For some reason our backs are always hurting...

Twister time!

Coloring and concentrating.

Who Have I Become?

The internet at the house has been super slow ever since New Years so there may be a few posts that are a little older making their way up here slowly but surely.

On New Year's Day we took presents to a severe special needs orphanage. The first time I went I was totally overwhelmed. I just stood there rubbing a little girl’s hands and crying. The kids are sweet and the conditions are ok there (no worse or better than anywhere else in my opinion) but seeing all those children rocking, screaming, biting their hands, and salivating was a little much for me. I have always said it was the hardest ministry related thing that I have ever done.

The next time I came I was better prepared but I still had this distance towards the kids. I’ve always commended people who feel like they are called to adopt or work with children who have severe special needs. But I always felt like that was for them, not me.

And then I meet Mirela.

Mirela is probably one of the more “normal” looking children from the outside. She is super thin but has good teeth and hair and a sweet, sweet face. One of the workers told us that she had been in foster care and had just been returned to the orphanage about a year ago. Mirela held my hand and waited patiently for her present then showed me everything she got excitedly. She really liked the hair ties and plastic rings. We played “beauty shop” for several minutes while Elena and I put in little pig tails and took pictures each step of the way. Afterwards we tried to talk with Mirela a little and that’s when her needs became obvious. She didn’t know her age or how long she had been in the orphanage or where she had come from. I think she knew that she had a sister at Voluntari (which the staff had already told me) but I don’t know how much else she was capable of understanding. Mirela will never get to go to school or have a job. She will likely not be placed in another foster family. Now that she is at the severe special needs orphanage she will be forgotten in the system. Out of sight, out of mind.

How could you not love this precious face so full of joy?!?!

As I left all I could think about is what will happen to Mirela. If she was in a loving family she might be able to learn simple tasks so she could have some sort of independence. She could never live on her own but she might be able to have a job or go to a special school. Most importantly I could see Mirela thriving in a loving family. She would bring so much joy to anyone who gave her attention. In fact, because she had spent time with a foster family I think she was better off than many of the kids there. She had some social skills that others in her orphanage lack.

Giving some love to this sweet little girl.

Of all the children I have meet I feel a real sense of urgency in getting Mirela out of the orphanage.

Reflections

Monday night I had the chance to sit down with one of my friends, Dorothy, and chat about Romania. Dorothy was on staff here for 9 months and it was good to get her insight into a lot of things about missions and ministry and life. She came here to teach music to the kids and started the band program that was carried on for 3 years. Dorothy can remember the exact moment that she decided to come to Romania for an extended period of time. By the time she got off the plane in America she had an entire program planned. Dorothy saw a need here that only she could fill.
As we talked I confessed to her that I didn't share her desire. As much as I want to want to come here and run the band program (since I have experience in teaching music and all) it is not a desire that God has placed on my heart. Strangely enough, I really do not feel strongly like I'm supposed to be here for a super long period of time. Maybe 3 months but not necessarily 3 years. And it's not like I'm not open to staying here for a long time. I would love to! But the desire, the calling from God, is not there. As I told Dorothy last night, I haven't found an itch that I feel like only I can scratch here in Romania.

At least, not yet.

Do I feel like I'm called to be here for Iulian and George and Ionut? Yes. I feel like I'm here for the long haul with them. But I'm not sure that it means packing my bags and being here 24/7. Maybe because ministry is more complicated than just being here for 3 or 4 or even 50 kids. It's about programing and managing hundreds of children and creating curriculum and cleaning and working. It's about parenting but about more than parenting. Needless to say I'm feeling a little confused and muddled. I want my heart and my head to want the same thing. I want some type of desire that says, "Sell it all! Move to Romania!" but, at least for today, it's not coming.